Restaurant review:

Seeing the light

We drove through every possible ambush right to the tip of the Peninsula

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All I ever wanted was a stretch, bullet-proof limousine and two press conferences from which to announce to a weary world that peace has been restored, after arduous talks and many concessions on both sides, in a turbulent region. Each single time, the job goes to men with French transliterated names or former US state department officials. Tired of waiting for the right conflict to emerge, I decided to go swimming.

The Intellectual was at the driving wheel as we drove to the Sinai, the land of colourful Bedouins and fishes, history and plastic bags. The scenery of uninterrupted mountains is relieved temporarily by blue water and the occasional checkpoint. The latter is referred to as kamin, or ambush, a word that should convey an element of surprise. But the only surprising thing about the kamins is their frequency. They appear every hour or so. The soldiers are supposed to check that you have the correct identity cards and visas with you, but -- unless we are dropped from air by a C-130 cargo plane carrying passenger vehicles, how on arid earth can our situation change every 80kms or so? The Israelites are said to have once lost their way for 40 years here. Since the Peninsula was a fairly well-travelled zone even back then, I have one possible explanation for this historical puzzle. The Hebrew tribes must have spent all that time dodging a multitude of ancient kamins.

Sharm El Sheikh has the air of suburbia: low-rise, white-washed, with sprawling neighbourhoods and ever-growing avenues. My companions have been frequenting it for years, and still manage to take the wrong turn almost every time. The Road to Peace, everyone knows, is long and winding. Its namesake in Sharm is smooth and lit and straightforward, but short of signs telling the occasional driver where to go. By sheer coincidence, we find the way to Al-Fanar (lighthouse) on the first attempt.

The Italian restaurant is perched on a seaside hill in Ras Umm Al-Sid. It has a massive terra cotta grotto with carpet-covered seating for Bedouin-style dining and an outside, tiled area for folks who wear shoes. We opt for the outside area. A sizable digital screen nearby is relaying the night's football match, Portugal versus the Netherlands. We're not football fans and decide to follow the events in the next table instead. There, two young and attractive women sit, baring every possible inch of their tattooed backs and then some in our direction. Their two male companions have manipulated their chairs into angles allowing them to follow the match without the women's drip-dry hair coming in the way. Two other well-built, conservatively-attired men sit quietly at the same table, perhaps to protect the mismatched foursome, or so speculates the Intellectual. We attempt to eavesdrop but fail, since not much of a conversation is underway.

Waiters dressed in white shirts and beige trousers bring us a bowl of salad and a basket of bread basted with olive oil and basil. Beers arrive, and the waiters place the bottles on the table along with the glasses, a practice I admire, since local waiters often have the urge to pour the drink themselves, sometimes by tilting the glass with the tip of the bottle, a habit that should be declared criminal by an international court of catering. The seafood pizza comes with a perfectly-baked thin crust and fresh bits of tomato atop. The calamari and shrimp with brandy cream is fresh and soft, almost as appetising as the tattoos displayed in the aforesaid table. The tortellini with cream and minced meat is deemed acceptable. For dessert, the chocolate tiramisu is not to be missed.

Al-Fanar, Sharm El-Sheikh, Ras Umm Al-Sid, (069 662 218), open 10am to 11pm, offers open air dining in a Euro-Bedouin setting. Dinner for four, LE520.

By Nabil Shawkat